I haven’t been too well lately. I am not going to go into detail right now, save to say that the last 3-4 weeks have been a bit difficult. I am not used to being not 100% and it is beginning to frustrate me. On the outside I am a picture of health, and compared to some I am not suffering greatly but for me – it’s becoming a drag.
It’s not even so much my diagnosis’s at the moment that are causing the biggest problems – it’s the medication that I am having to take. On balance, I could be suffering worse side effects. The problem, is that the medication is causing different side effects day-to-day. So, I feel like I am complaining about something different every day. In fact, I am becoming very consciously aware of how much I have been moaning. The trouble is, I haven’t wanted to bring more than just a few of my closest into my confidence – which means that they are bearing the brunt. This includes my poor boss who must be really bored of me. My husband – well, he deserves a sainthood lol! And, not knowing how each day is going to pan out in advance makes planning my day in the best way, without others becoming aware there is a problem – or thinking that I am lazy, quite tricky.
I recently got a long-awaited and hard-worked for promotion. I love my new job. In fact, I have worked towards this particular position for most of my career. Why is it that just as you get what you want something like this happens? I think it’s called Sod’s Law! Along with the actual underlying problems, I now sometimes feel worse than I had before the medical system began “treating” me. Mostly, I am having periods – usually in the afternoons, of absolutely overwhelming tiredness. It isn’t a quick fix either. After having 8 weeks or so of this medication, I need to have a fairly big surgery. I will write about that nearer the time as that is not really what this post is about. It will all be worth it in the long run though when I am back to my usual whirlwind self!!
I feel like I shouldn’t complain so much. I can manage the things that I need too, and all of this is temporary. I haven’t had to take any time off of work yet except for medical appointments. I have two weeks of annual leave only a few days away and will be back in Tenerife (my favourite place in the world!) this Saturday which we are very excited about. At one point before the good old Dr’s had decided what our plan of action was we considered cancelling the holiday and I am so pleased now that we didn’t. It’s actually all worked out very well, as these things usually do. I have an amazing husband who is helping no end, a great family, understanding boss and very good friends. I even have my blog to vent on!!
But what has really made me cross this evening, and lead to my complaining by way of this blog post, is that on top of everything else, I have today developed a stinking cold. It’s summer for goodness sake. I don’t even get colds in the winter when everyone else has them! There have been times when my whole family have been full of nasty colds and I don’t get so much as a sniffle … Until now. Which will give me something else to complain about for a few days no doubt. But you know what – It really is just Sods Law!!